Sunday, January 15, 2006

35 and still alive, or, choices

As I approach my birthday this week, I am so grateful to just be here, period. It has been an uphill battle for the past 18 or so months. But this week, having been diagnosed with a far less horrible illness than anticipated, I've made up for lost time.

On Sundays, I get worn out pretty easily after participating in the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass. I love a good nap afterwards. But today, I tried something different... I cooked meals for the entire week.

It ain't easy being the Mom of 5, 'specially if you're used to flying by the seat of your pants. Having done that for over 15 years, it is indeed refreshing to get it together and try to keep it that way. A new Frigidaire washer (made in the USA!!) and a little story on NPR about Super Suppers helped get the energy going.

It's not so much that I'm lazy as it is that I am very easily overwhelmed. We plumbed the depths of that twice in the past year, and although I considered myself extremely easygoin', the truth is, I am a rabid stress puppy.

And so, with a great amount of joy, we have made life a whole lot more organized in the past week. I have been storming heaven for the energy I need to be the person I'd like to become. It's been exhausting, but it is thrilling in the end to have acheived so much in a short period of time.

Here's the short list:
fixed walls in the house
caught up on laundry with the help of an *awesome* new washer
homeschooled completely and successfully every day
reorganized the shed so Mr. Conviviality could find tools to improve the ranch
cooked meals for a week in one felled swoop
reorganized kids' rooms (esp. closets)

There's more piddly, mundane day to day stuff that was accomplished. But the jist of this all is, I might actually become the woman I have always wanted to be in my 35th year. I am not 19 anymore (THANK YOU, GOD!!) I can finally look forward to growing old rather than attempting to stay young. (Nearly dyin' will do that to a person.)

Our Pope calls it "perpetual adolescence." I'm finally moving beyond it.

I thank God for my health, my husband, and my babies.

And I am eternally grateful for my friends, without whom this past year would have been impossible to survive. You are blessings. Thank you.

2 comments:

The LQ said...

uber-mucho-hugs!

-- rufel

celogomama said...

Thank you, Q of Ls :)