How can 9 years still feel like yesterday?
Mom & Dad's Song
Another song they loved
Daddy always danced with his 3 ladies whenever this song came on
This was ALWAYS one of Daddy's favorite songs. He'd lay back, hands behind his head, eyes closed, and sing.
Time and again, It was a poignant reminder of all he truly desired from this world.
Daddy always liked this song, too. It took on a life of its own after he learned he had cancer. We'd all dance and hug.
I liked this song more than Daddy did, but it seems to fit as a memorial of his passing.
Now THIS Marley tune would bring a very bright smile to my Daddy's eyes :)
It has been a rough, rough, nine years for me. I literally stored the camera and video recorder away because, for 9 years, I couldn't stand the idea of a family photo without my Dad in it. If you saw me this weekend, you know I only very recently learned to take photos with a smile again.
And finally, my Adoration song. Seriously, this has been my Adoration meditation for years now. The spirit has hope that is the ONLY thing which can transcend the dismal despair the mind and body can become ensnared in. Prayer is the ONLY place where our earthly selves come into communion with that which we can not KNOW.... yet. This is why I pray for All Souls, especially Daddy's....
I was SO HAPPY Daddy no longer had to suffer that it took 9 years to recognize the depth of my depression over the loss of his mortal love. If it were not for CD and the children, I would have died right along with Daddy. That is the absolute truth.
Thank you, my beloved husband, for keeping me on the life support only unconditional love can achieve. You have suffered much with me and because of my inability to admit or express my grief. Ich beehre Dich sehr! You certainly chose the perfect patron saint...
And so, with this rather long tribute to my Father, ending in tribute to my Husband, I begin digging the grave this damnable depression belongs in.
May lilies and roses begin to grow.
4 comments:
Hugs to you, my dear! It has been 10 years this March since my Mom passed, and it will be almost exactly 11 years next March when my daughter will be born- almost to the day. It is kind of eerie that way that both my sister and I have babies born almost exactly on the anniversary of her death. It is never easy, a loss of a parent, but we can get out from under it with the help of those who love us!
Thanks, Anna. This is especially true:
" we can get out from under it with the help of those who love us!"
The only joy was to be found with CD and the children, which is probably why I was compelled to keep them all so close to me.
My parents, sister, and I grew up very insular. Putting the kids in school was my way of breaking this. I need others' love and light in my life, so I do not suck those around me dry of their own brilliance.
Love ya. Hugs
::very big hugs::
Thanks LQ. Love ya!
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